GREEDY LAWYER

After my first production run earlier this year this is the label I planned to put on my premium bottles of moonshine and bathtub gin.

But then, my Domenican ex-lawyer (fired for greed and refusing to remove her hand from my pocket) advised that the picture might invite a lawsuit from United Fruit on the grounds that it demeaned their main fruit export! Can you imagine any advice more silly than that!!!!! Another reason why I tossed her!!!!

Why, for Heaven's Sake, would a picture of me dressed up in an avocado suit make people lose their appetite for avocados??????? I'm kicking myself for trusting the bad advice of an expensive Dominican lawyer who doesn't even speak English good!

Well, I'm living and learning how to be very careful about doing business in the DR, especially taking advice from native Dominicans and certain ex-pats; it's just another example of how I'm entirely too trusting.

I'm now looking for a new lawyer who's not greedy, speaks English good, and won't be demanding payment everytime I speak with him/her. But that's another story.

For now, what do viewers think of my AVOCADOMAN label? Do you think it demeans Avocados? All comments are welcome and will be printed though, be warned, any bad language and comments that begin, "Dear M*****F***** will be removed (i.e. use of code words). I regret no compensation will offered for any suggestions whether accepted or ignored.